DEPARTMENT:

Call Me Nana

In the past, whenever I saw those multigenerational photos in the newspaper I’d turn up my nose and think, What’s to be proud of? Anybody can make babies — it’s a lot harder not to make them!
Even when my friends proudly shared photos of the newest of their 20 grandchildren and my fellow lady lunchers ooohed and ahhhed over how cute the little button-nosed baby was, I’d be thinking, There they go, overpopulating an already crowded world. I was rather proud of the fact that 35 years ago my husband and I did the politically correct thing in limiting ourselves to only two sons — one child to replace each of us.

So when the tender feelings that arose with grandmahood came gushing forth I was pretty much in a state of denial. With the birth of the first little genius five years ago, I made it clear that “Nana” as a moniker worked better for me than Grandma.

Luckily, I enjoy the benefit of having a second home near the Mainland homes of my sons, but I quickly found being a grandmother takes a certain amount of balancing and plenty of enthusiasm and energy. With the birth of the first little boy, I would volunteer my time at any moment. The second curly-headed cherub made it harder to babysit — especially when the older one had a sharp little voice that could yell “Na-na, Na-na, Na-na” a lot more insistently than his younger brother, who only manages a nasal one-syllable “Naa” so far.

Then along came the third grandbaby boy from daughter-in-law number two, and suddenly I had to make sure I was babysitting equally for both mothers so I couldn’t be accused of favoritism. Now we’ve got a fourth grandson; the tots’ ages are four months, nine months, almost three years and five years.

Kailua resident Betty Fullard-Leo cruises the Columbia River with grandson Timothy, then four years old.

I’m finding that I learn the most from the oldest, who could easily be nicknamed Timothy Talker. At my house he’s allowed to play educational, non-violent computer games. I had no idea how to download “addictinggames.com,” but Timothy not only pulls them up from the Internet, he beats me at all of them.

In addition, he self-monitors, so if we accidentally find a game requiring gangsters to shoot at defenseless women, he exits the program, saying in a righteous tone of voice, “Nana, I’m not allowed to play that kind of game.”

As a grandmother, I am allowed certain privileges. For example, I can give my grandsons more sweets than they might get at home — but not too many more — so I keep a candy jar shaped like a cottage that contains Viactiv calcium caramels. It’s become a tradition for the two older boys to head for this special treat every time. Because they understand the caramels are vitamins, they are content to be allowed only one a visit, and I can justify giving them additional sweets later because Viactiv is not candy!

Our grandchildren recently concluded visits with us in our Hawaii home. First we had Timothy, Gabriel, Noah and their parents with us for six nights, then Austin and his parents arrived for a 10-day stay. Yes, we breathed a sigh of relief when the house was quiet again, but I have to admit, we keep hoping there will be two more little ones in the family at this time next year. After all, our sons and daughters-in-law have to keep trying until they get a little girl for Nana to spoil. The heck with overpopulating the world! — Betty Fullard-Leo

Humorous, touching, inspiring, thought-provoking — we welcome your personal observations about Life After Fifty. E-mail your 800-word essay and phone number to Editor Cheryl Chee Tsutsumi at cheryl@tradepublishing.com or send them to her c/o Trade Publishing, 287 Mokauea Street, Honolulu, Hawaii 96819. By doing so, you grant Generations Hawaii’s editorial staff the right to edit your submission at their discretion.

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